10 Oct

I was meditating on Psalm 138 today, just soaking in what David wrote to the Lord in this particular psalm. One section of the last verse speaks to me on so many levels:

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O LORD, endures forever.

Despite the past, the trials, the confusion, anything that comes my way, the Lord’s purpose for my life will prevail. He is good, He is on the throne, He is in control.

I think a large part of my problem is that I look back on my life and think, “God, I’ve messed so much of this up, how can you use me now?” I know, deep in my heart, that there is grace, that God uses broken things. I feel Him mending my heart. I see Him doing new, exciting things that I can’t even wrap my mind around.

Everything has led me here. That thought hit me this past weekend when I was listening to Pastor Scott lead a session at Freefall. I’ve said it before, but it just really hit me. My mistakes, failed relationships, the hurts, and the trials, all brought me to where I am; it’s a place of growth, of new life, new friendships, new instruction from awesome leadership within the two young adult groups that I attend.

Sometimes God has to allow us to be broken, as much as that hurts, and as hard as it is to understand. I was broken 8 months ago, and now I recognize it for what it was. I had to come a place where I recognized God as my only refuge, my only safe place. Now when the trials come, as they inevitably do, I cling to Him, and He gets me through. He’s teaching me to love again, teaching me to open up, showing me who I can feel safe with; He is doing a good work, and I am so excited to see where things go from here…


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: